To one of my closest friends,
I know that you're at the point where encouragement is not all that helpful. Stress, depression, and the unfortunate onset of mono have you in a place that is pretty much closed off to any sort of uplifting thought. However, I'm still going to write to you anyways. This season will past. You are not defined by your afflictions.
Romans 8:26-27
...the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don't know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words. And the Father who knows all hearts knows what the spirit is saying, for the spirit pleads for us believers in harmony with God's own will.
Depression alone is debilitating. It shoots down any possibility for motivation and eventually leads to the shutting down of emotions. I normally refer to this state as "being numb". I do not know if you've reached this point, but if you have I understand where you're at. At least, in a sense. For, no two peoples' experiences are ever quite the same, but you know what I mean. On top of this depression, I know that stress has a way of pulling you between two extremes. First being the indifference of depression and the intense dissonance of stress.
Long story short, you're in fear and doubt of a lot of things right now. You're looking up hill and feeling as if you're weighed down by all of these calamities. You fear you won't make it much further. But thankfully, we weren't designed to walk this thing alone. One of the most common commands found throughout scripture is that telling us to not fear. The command to not doubt is also in there quite a bit. Sounds nice enough, but we both know it is a lot more difficult than simply ceasing to fear or doubt. So, what do we do to take steps in this direction?
First of all, I challenge you to evaluate yourself differently. Take a step back for a minute. If someone else were in your position, what kind of advice would you give them? What would you expect of them and their performance? I'm almost certain that you'd expect much less of them than you're expecting of yourself in this season. Take heart, those around you are not disappointed in you. We love you. And so does God.
It's so easy to tell someone to just stop worrying about something. It's not so easy to receive this advice and actually follow through with it. I've never been told to stop worrying and that alone was enough to stop me from worrying. Ideally, there's a shift in circumstances. Either that, or a shift in heart. Neither of which are things that we have a whole lot of control over, at least not in a genuine sense. We can choose to look at circumstances differently, but deep down, we know the circumstances haven't changed. We can choose to have a different heart towards a matter... or at least we think we can. The problem is that this shift was originated in our heads... thus, making it a shift in our minds. The heart is still in despair.
What are we to do in a situation like this? To put it simply, we call upon the One who can do something about it. We've all heard that God can make all things new. This is including our hearts, even out circumstances. Not only is He able, He is willing. When we know that God is able and willing to shift the course of reality out of love for us, our foundation for being overwhelmed practically ceases to exist.
We don't expect anything of you. We know that you are stronger than you think you are.
I will walk with you through this season.
I will not give up on you.
Your friend,
Jake
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